As a former digital nomad and a remote freelancer/entrepreneur, I know how daunting it can be to make friends in a new city. You probably have questions like…
- How do I meet new people?
- How do I start a conversation?
- And how do I deepen the relationship?
The good news is, all of these questions can be answered if you know where to meet like-minded folks. Why?
Being in the right place is half the battle, as you can increase the odds of other people wanting to get to know you before you even talk with them.
Over the last two decades, I’ve stayed on three continents (North America, Asia, and Europe — plus multiple cities. Each move required me to build new relationships or rebuild existing ones.
Before I share a few spots where you can connect with interesting people, here are some shortcuts to help you make friends faster:
1. Befriend people that you meet on a regular basis
This can be a work colleague, a fellow coworking space member, a neighbor, or even the cafe barista that fuels your morning coffee addiction every day 🙂
There are two reasons why you should seriously consider this:
- Save time: Carving out time in your schedule to make new friends takes extra effort. Talking to your colleague over lunch is a lot easier.
- Leverage the mere exposure effect: The more familiar you seem to others, the more likely they will be open to chatting.
2. Ask for intros
Whenever I move to a new city, I like asking my friends or collaborators if they could introduce me to folks they know well.
This helps me skip the whole do-I-trust-this-person dance — or, the small-talk-because-we-are-polite dance — and jump into meaningful conversations.
To make it easy for your friends or contacts to introduce you, here’s what you could say (modify based on your tone of voice, personality, etc.):
“I’m looking to meet new people in <city name>. Do you happen to know any good friends there?”
If they say yes, you could say something like:
>”Great! I’d love an intro. Here’s a bit more about me <what you do, an interesting/fun fact about you> and my email/phone number…”
3. Organize dinner parties
Upon first impression, organizing dinner parties can feel like a lot of work. Why would this be a low-hanging fruit to make new friends?
While hosting a dinner party takes effort, it’s one of the highest-ROI things you could do to nurture new friendships. Why?
- Dinner parties are more intimate than the usual social events, which helps people connect on a deeper level
- Guests will naturally pay attention to you, since you’re the star of the party
- You have the opportunity to bring interesting people together, which dramatically increases your social brownie points
If you’re interested in hosting a dinner party, here are a few tips that have worked for me:
- Start small. Start by inviting one person to dinner. Then, invite them and another friend of theirs. Once you’re comfortable, invite two people to dinner, each person would bring a plus one… you get the idea.
- Outsource cooking. Cooking and hosting at the same time is a Herculean feat. Just order pizzas, or turn your dinner party into a potluck.
I recommend checking out Jon Levy’s TED talk about how he invited influential people to his dinner parties.
Alright, moving on — here are a few ways you can meet people and make new friends in Singapore.
4. Meet fellow entrepreneurs, freelancers or remote workers
Join a coworking space
Given the open office nature of coworking spaces, I’ve found it much easier to strike up conversations — even while soaping my hands in the public washroom!
Here are a few coworking spaces that others have rated highly:
- WeWork – Office Space & Coworking
- The Great Room One George Street
- The Great Room Centennial Tower
- workbuddy
- The Workshop Ang Mo Kio
- CoQoons
- MOX – Co-Making for Creatives @ OXLEY
- the Hive Lavender
- The General Room – TripleOne Somerset
Most coworking spaces are connected to cafes. I’d approach people when they’re relaxing with their coffee or lunch i.e. when they aren’t furiously typing away.
10 easy ways to talk to strangers at a cafe
Join an online community
If jumping into a coworking space feels too much at first, try online communities. Here are a few that I would recommend (still active, relatively spam-free)
- General Assembly Singapore
- Singapore Tech-Switchers
- Singapore Startup Community
- Junior Developers Singapore
- Women Who Code Singapore
- Data Science Dojo Singapore
- Agile Singapore
- Blockchain Singapore Meetup (NFT, DeFi, Crypto & Web3)
- Singapore Business Networking Meetup
Having co-founded and managed online communities of hundreds of thousands of members, here are a few tips to get the most out of whatever community/group you join:
- Be a star member: Regularly engage with other members’ posts, leave positive comments and offer helpful ideas when requested.
- Take initiative: Depending on the community’s policies, suggest or organize events and invite other members to join.
- Get to know the community founders/moderators: They will be more open to connecting than typical members, since it’s in their incentives to have an active community. Also, they would have the best grasp on who you should connect with.
Attend a business conference or networking event
The biggest reason why people attend business events?
To connect with others.
Whether it’s learning from top experts, meeting industry peers, or finding potential collaborators, business event attendees are there to connect. Which makes it super easy for you to start conversations!
Here are two helpful resources for you:
- Eventbrite’s lists of upcoming conferences and networking events in Singapore
- 11 easy ways to talk to strangers at a conference
5. Join a hobby group (or create your own)
If you have the same hobby, you have a natural topic to spark conversations with.
This isn’t a complete list by any means, but I picked out popular hobby groups that are still active i.e. organized events in the last month or so.
- Hiking: Exploring Singapore Hiking Group, Adventures Unlimited Singapore
- Walking: Deep Breathing Brisk Walking
- HIIT: Free Bootcamp HIIT @ Singapore Botanic Gardens, Workout@Strength/HIIT (All levels)
- Running: The ‘Run to Eat’ Club, Free Bootcamp HIIT @ Singapore Botanic Gardens (they include running as part of the workouts)
- Badminton: Avengers Badminton Club ABC
- Languages: The Language Lovers, Singapore’s Language & Culture Exchange, Singapore Japanese lessons from total beginner to advanced
- Music: Beginner Guitarists Jam And Sing Along, KTV FUN CLUB
- Photography: Singapore Photography Community
- Reading: Silent Book Club Singapore
- Board games: Singapore International Boardgames Meetup
- Chess: Singapore Chess Meetup
29 hobbies conversation starters to spark meaningful conversations
Alternatives: create your own hobby group, or join a festival!
- Create your own hobby group: Being a Meetup or Facebook group founder gets you in the spotlight, which can help you make friends faster.
- Join a festival: Here’s Eventbrite’s list of upcoming festivals in Singapore. Some festivals also accept volunteers, like the Singaporean Writers Festival.
6. Be a volunteer
Similar to joining a hobby group, volunteering helps you meet like-minded people. A study shows that volunteers have more social connections than non-volunteers.
In fact, connecting with someone who believes in the same social cause and engaging in meaningful experiences together will deepen your budding friendship.
Volunteer at a nonprofit
While it’s by no means comprehensive, here’s a list of local nonprofits that I found most interesting:
- Willing Hearts: they run “a soup kitchen that prepares, cooks and distributes about 11,000 daily meals to over 70 locations island wide, 365 days a year.
- ItsRainingRaincoats: They support migrant workers in a variety of ways, from providing hot meals to teaching them English
- Silver Ribbon: They promote mental health literacy by organizing workshops and providing counseling services.
- aidha: Their mission is to “help migrant domestic workers and low-income women achieve economic independence through financial education.”
- Lions Befrienders: They provide holistic care to seniors.
- ReadAble: they run “weekly reading and language arts classes for children”. They have also built a community library for the kids.
- Yellow Ribbon Singapore: Their mission is to “help inmates and ex-offenders rebuild their lives and lower the recidivism rate through skills and long term career development, with an effective Aftercare support network.”
- Babes: They are the “only organization in Singapore that is devoted to exclusively supporting pregnant teenagers in crisis.”
- Causes For Animals Singapore: They save the lives of stray cats and dogs.
- Singapore Red Cross: They provide critical services to communities.
Volunteer at science/culture centers
- Science Centre Singapore
- Mind Science Centre
- National Arts Council
- National Gallery Singapore
- Singapore Art Museum
- National Museum of Singapore
- Asian Civilisations Museum
- Lee Kong Chian Natural History Museum
- Malay Heritage Centre
- Indian Heritage Centre
- Sun Yat Sen Nanyang Memorial Hall
Volunteer at events
If you prefer helping out without an ongoing commitment, I would first check out Giving.sg since they have a wonderful filtering system to help you find the most interesting opportunities.
You could also check out the list of curated volunteer opportunities by SG Cares.
7. Connect with people who are also ready to connect 🙂
Duh! So obvious right? But if you think about it, the success of new friendships depends on something most people — including myself — would hate to admit:
If the other person is interested in talking too.
That’s why it can be underrated to join general social groups, where people meet to simply connect and have fun. Embrace serendipity and check out these groups:
- The Expats (and Diplomats) Club of Singapore (7000+ expats)
- Singapore Expats & Locals Social Club (8100+ friends)
- Singapore International Friends (18480+ friends!)
- Celebrate Our Differences (COD)
- You Only Live Once Group YOLO
- International Singles in the city! Singapore (7000+ singles)
- Singapore Fun Events (SFE) – 18,000+ Members
8. Talk with strangers in community spaces
Talking with strangers can be terrifying.
So how can you minimize the risk of social rejection?
Based on my experience approaching thousands of strangers, here’s a favorite tip of mine:
Talk with people who are not in a rush!
Whether they are window shopping or admiring nature, they will be a lot more likely to engage in conversation.
Here are a few community spaces that I recommend checking out:
Artisan marketplaces
Community gardens
Parks
(see list of park activities here)