Scientifically reviewed by Has Spotify come to your rescue when you’re anxious or stressed?
It has for me — I have a list of songs that I replay in times of anxiety.
A meta-analysis shows that listening to music helps reduce anxiety. Music therapy, in particular, is a promising treatment for anxiety (though its longer-term effects have yet to be established.)
But how does music affect the brain, really?
Andrew E. Budson, MD, wrote:
“…because music can activate almost all brain regions and networks, it can help to keep a myriad of brain pathways and networks strong”
Iffah Suraya Jasni, M.Couns., added: “I certainly think music enables us to connect with the world in a playful way.”
Given the power of music, here’s a list of songs that I curated with the help of multiple therapists.
Rather than going by genre — a Herculean effort, since you and I likely have different tastes — I selected songs that convey one facet of social anxiety or another, which hopefully helps you relate to them (and sing along!)
Deeper Conversations by Yuna
The name of my website is inspired by this song! What I like about the lyrics is how Yuna expresses the desire to connect so beautifully. See the excerpt below:
🎵 And if you don't mind can you tell me all your hopes & fears
And everything that you believe in
Would you make a difference in the world
I'd love for you to take me to a deeper conversation
Creep by Radiohead
I had a tough time making friends and getting dates as a young adult, and I often sang this as a form of emotional release.
🎵 But I'm a creep
I'm a weirdo
What the hell am I doin' here?
I don't belong here
I Don’t Care by Ed Sheeran & Justin Bieber
If you ever feel that you’re left out at a party, this song is for you *hugs* Ed Sheeran himself experiences social anxiety, which makes the song that much more authentic:
🎵 Don't think I fit in at this party
Everyone's got so much to say (yeah)
I always feel like I'm nobody, mm
Who wants to fit in anyway?
Not Myself by John Mayer
Like Ed Sheeran, John Mayer has lived through social anxiety. In an interview, he revealed that the song was inspired by one of his panic attacks:
🎵 There are times
I lose my worried mind
Would you want me when I'm not myself?
Wait it out while I am someone else?
Nervous by Shawn Mendes
If you were to rank the most anxiety-inducing moments, meeting an attractive person would be in the top 10 list of many (including me!) I love how accurately Shawn Mendes captures the connection between eye contact and symptoms of social anxiety:
🎵 I saw you on a Sunday in a cafe
And all you did was look my way
And my heart started to race
And my hands started to shake, yeah
Crowded Places by Banks
Banks mentioned on Instagram that this song is about “social anxiety and falling in love”, and I can see the connection — throughout the song, Banks expresses the anguish of love lost:
🎵 'Cause I've been scared of crowded places
Come with me, I'll take you home
Rise Up by Andra Day
Thanks for the recommendation Cheryl Kong, M.Couns.! This might just be the theme song for exposure therapy: leaning into social anxiety again and again even when it’s hard. Just take a peek at the lyrics and you will see what I mean:
🎵 In spite of the ache
I'll rise up
And I'll do it a thousand times again
Courage To Change by Sia
Thanks for the recommendation Smitha Murthy! This is another great song to highlight what makes exposure therapy effective: the willingness to lean into what makes you socially anxious, so that you can grow into the person you want to become.
🎵 Have I the courage to change?
Have I the courage to change?
Have I the courage to change today? (Oh)
Answer:Love Yourself by BTS
Thanks for the recommendation Yong Xin Lim, MClinPsy! I’m a fan of the song for a few reasons: it accurately captures how hard it is to be self-compassionate, and how harshly we tend to judge ourselves vs. others.
(Another BTS song that touches on social anxiety is The Last by AGUST D – check it out here.)
🎵 Why do you keep trying to hide under your mask? (Hey-ey-ey)
Even all the scars from your mistakes make up your constellation, ayy
Don’t Delete The Kisses By Wolf Alice
Not sure about the melody, but the lyrics sure gave me goosebumps… overthinking is a major driver of social anxiety, especially when there’s a significant outcome at stake, say getting a date or asking someone to be your girlfriend/boyfriend.
🎵And then I'm trapped, overthinking
And yeah, probably self-doubt
You tell me to get over it
And to take you out
But I can't, I'm too scared
Sleep Like A Child by Joss Stone
Alright, so this isn’t really about social anxiety, but I like how Joss Stone sings about the importance of social support in difficult times:
🎵 You won't be alone
For I will not be denied
Under the darkest of skies
I'm gonna be by your side
You Will Be Found by Sam Smith & Summer Walker
Thanks for the recommendation Iffah, M.Couns.! This song also sings about the importance of friendships when you feel challenging emotions. And, the first verse captures the pain of social isolation and loneliness so well:
🎵 Have you ever felt like nobody was there?
Have you ever felt forgotten in the middle of nowhere?
Have you ever felt like you could disappear?
Like you could fall, and no one would hear?
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