Overthinking after social events? It’s normal. Here’s what to do.
Do you feel embarrassed or sad after each social interaction? Learn these techniques to manage your anxiety.
Written by: Ian Chew, MHFA
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Ian Chew, MHFA
As part of my journey to overcome social anxiety, I also cold emailed top entrepreneurs and leaders. At first, I had tons of rejections — well, no one responded! As I got better at the art of outreach however, I ended up working with people like Eben Pagan, Michael Simmons (Inc. 30 Under 30), and Amir Ahmad Nasr (coach to 9-figure CEOs), ultimately helping them reach tens of millions of people online.
For my work and projects, I've been featured by top media outlets including Fortune, CBC, Inc. Magazine, and Canadian Geographic. I also did a TEDx speech on my experience talking with strangers (link below).
I started Deeper Conversations to share everything I've learned — and am learning — about communication and relationships.
(Here's the full back story on why I created the site.)
Education
Bachelor of Arts (Sociology) at Mount Allison University
Certifications
- Social Anxiety Disorder Comprehensive Training Course, PESI
- 2-Day Certificate Course: CBT For Anxiety, PESI
- ACT for Depression & Anxiety Disorders, Psychwire
- Rewire the Anxious Brain: Neuroscience-Informed Treatment of Anxiety, Panic and Worry, PESI
- The Power Of Awareness, Greater Good Science Center - University of California, Berkeley
- Psychological First Aid, John Hopkins University
- Mental Health First Aid, Malaysian Mental Health Association
Media features
- Inc. Magazine: Want to Win People's Trust? This TEDx Speaker Says Do This 1 Thing | Inc.com
- TEDxMoncton: What I learned from 700 interviews in three years | Ian Chew
- CBC: Humans of Sackville
Latest articles
Why do I get anxious before socializing?
The more you worry, the more anxious you become, according to research. And as a leading anxiety researcher, wrote…
Written by: Ian Chew, MHFA
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Safety behaviors in social anxiety: how they make anxiety worse
They can often be invisible. But once you spot them, you will see them across your conversations…
Written by: Ian Chew, MHFA
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9 ways to make exposure therapy fun
Exposure is an effective but tough treatment. Here are a few ways to make it less intimidating.
Written by: Ian Chew, MHFA
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Why exposure therapy might not work for social anxiety
Exposure is an effective CBT technique. So why wouldn’t it work!?
Written by: Ian Chew, MHFA
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57 social anxiety exposure challenges to build your courage
Exposure therapy can be very effective to treat social anxiety. Based on my experience as well as ideas from therapists, here’s a list of 51 ideas.
Written by: Ian Chew, MHFA
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Cognitive behavior therapy (CBT) for social anxiety
CBT is the most effective treatment for social anxiety. Here’s what I learned from the co-founder of the National Social Anxiety Center…
Written by: Ian Chew, MHFA
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Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) for social anxiety
ACT is a popular therapy method that’s been validated by over 1,000 studies. But does it work for social anxiety?
Written by: Ian Chew, MHFA
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How to deal with social anxiety in the moment
What do you do right when you feel socially anxious? The last thing you want to do is this…
Written by: Ian Chew, MHFA
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What’s the best type of meditation for social anxiety?
Here are four meditation techniques to help you break the Social Anxiety Spiral.
Written by: Ian Chew, MHFA
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Does mindfulness help social anxiety? Yes (here’s how)
I’ve taken courses taught by Jack Kornfield, Tara Brach and other respected mindfulness teachers. Here’s what I’ve learned:
Written by: Ian Chew, MHFA
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How to make eye contact when socially anxious
Why eye contact is so hard, and six tips to make it easier.
Written by: Ian Chew, MHFA
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How to deal with awkward smiling when socially anxious
It’s unrealistic to stop smiling politely. Here are a few pragmatic ideas to consider instead:
Written by: Ian Chew, MHFA
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4 things to do if your mind goes blank in conversations
How can you bring your brain back online and continue the conversation? Here are a few strategies:
Written by: Ian Chew, MHFA
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How to stop overthinking conversations (for socially anxious)
You can’t necessarily stop overthinking, but you can reduce your tendency. Here are a few proven ways:
Written by: Ian Chew, MHFA
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Can you force yourself out of social anxiety? No. Here’s why
I used to think I could, but I was wrong. Here’s what I learned.
Written by: Ian Chew, MHFA
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Can you be confident and have social anxiety? Yes (here’s why)
While research shows a negative correlation between self-esteem and social anxiety, there’s more nuance to it. Here are a few things to consider:
Written by: Ian Chew, MHFA
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How to end an online conversation politely
Does anyone still remember MSN? The clunky but popular messaging app that kids were crazy about 16 years ago? As far as I could remember, … Read more
Written by: Ian Chew, MHFA
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5 ways to end a phone call without being awkward
Having worked remotely over the last decade, I’ve probably done more phone calls than most professionals. Compared to video calls, phone calls can be much … Read more
Written by: Ian Chew, MHFA
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6 non-awkward ways to end a conversation at a networking event
Here’s how many people end networking conversations: “Let’s exchange business cards”. Or, “Can I have your business card?” I’ve been to many networking events as … Read more
Written by: Ian Chew, MHFA
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